Who actually invented this "forever"?
And who on earth gave birth to the idea that a relationship, a marriage, a friendship is only good if it lasts a lifetime?
Of course, that's what we wish for, but on closer inspection it doesn't correspond at all to the cycle of our lives.
Life itself is a never-ending cycle of coming into being and passing away, being with each other and letting go of each other, saying goodbye and letting go, starting something new again.
Everything, everything around us enters this cycle, lives this cycle. In this way there is no standstill, change is part of everything. In nature, too, it becomes clear that something new only comes into being when the old has been let go.
Thus we are born and the cycle begins.
We live and we die in the process of all life.
Change is part of our earthly life
We often start something new, when we no longer feel comfortable in the old or it simply no longer suits us.
We no longer feel happy with what is.
Whether it's in our job, in our body, in a relationship - this basically applies to all levels. And just as life in our physical body does not last FOREVER, many other things are not designed to last forever - as much as we would like them to.
This may be true for some relationships, but it is not the rule.
And if that is the case, and relationships are not normally designed to last a lifetime, then we don't need to feel bad, if it didn't work out. We can just see it as a natural process of our lives.
And so today I want to share with you something that took me some time to understand completely in its entirety. It was my own personal path of recognition - served up for me by life, in small, bite-sized morsels.
We all go through these processes all the time. They last as long as they last - in my case, two and a half years ;)
What, if it does'nt work?
Relationship or marriage does not automatically mean "forever".
No matter who made it up or whether it is written in the oldest book in the world, it is not true for most of us.
Here's what I've come to understand in the course of my own process: Good relationships are not characterised by the fact that they last forever, but by what our souls take from them - on their earthly journey here.
Maybe we didn't "fail" because the relationship or marriage didn't last "forever", because that's not how it was meant to be for certain souls.
And maybe it was simply time for our souls to move on.
To gather more experiences, to go new ways.
For me, having a loving relationship or marriage means: We will both do our best to be there for each other. We will support each other, be respectful and mindful of each other and carry our loved one through life within our means. At all times, the good and the bad.
But what if the time comes when we stop growing in each other and with each other? When our love gets stuck in the mud of everyday life, and despite all our good will and all our attempts, we still can't find our way to each other?
When at a certain point there is no more WE?
What if at a certain point we have perhaps learned enough from each other and it is time to move on? Exactly as our soul planned from the beginning when it decided to incarnate into this body, this life.
And hey, this realisation should not be a free pass to not put any care and love into the relationship. And all of you, who are happily in love out there right now: enjoy it! It is wonderful to feel the right person by your side. From the bottom of my heart I wish it to be forever - and for some it will be. These lines are for those for whom the time has come to move on.
I asked my cat girl Tilda: Why does it feel like it's forever at the beginning of a love affair? When it's not?
She answered: "Because in that moment, that's exactly how it is. In the presence of your moment, it is set up as "forever" - that's exactly how you feel and that's exactly how it is right. So
you go your way together for a while. Until at some point movement comes into the matter. You cannot ignore the plan of your soul. It is always there."
Why we are here
I think many of us have simply forgotten that our souls did not come here to be stuck or to hold on to the familiar at all costs.
We are also not here to be permanently sad or saddened. Of course, these feelings also belong, wanted to be felt - just not permanently, not for a lifetime!
And certainly souls did not come here to do or feel the same thing - day in, day out.
We are all here to learn. With each other, on each other.
To grow, to love each other, to feel everything there is to feel with mind and body. Our souls long for these experiences, that's what they came here for.
And the call of your soul can be very clear, it can manifest itself in physical pain, for example, so that you change direction or simply get things moving. And maybe that means that you belong to those who cannot keep this "forever". Because it is not compatible with your soul's plan, because there is more to come and there will be, because you meet other souls and you support each other in the common learning process.
And when your time comes, you just move on. Maybe you grow with someone or something else. That's the way it's meant to be. I finally understood after two and a half years of separation: There is no need to be miserable - if it is part of your journey here on earth.
I remember the words of my wise cat-girl: You can't override your soul's plan.
Open your heart and go further.
And when your time comes, you just move on.
Maybe you grow with someone or something else.
That's the way it's meant to be.
I finally understood after two and a half years of separation: There is no need to be miserable - if it is part of your journey here on earth.
and I remember the words of my wise cat-girl: You can't override your soul's plan.
For me too, for some time now, it has been about opening my heart wide again, remembering with gratitude and honouring the love that has connected me to us and will always connect me.
Now I am allowed to be full of joy with what is there right now.
Knowing that it is just right the way it is.
Wherever YOU are right now, dear reader, in whatever direction your path is going - always be sure: it IS yours. It is right for you.
And if it is also the right time for you, in whatever area - then there is nothing wrong with that. Probably everything is just going according to plan :)
All the best,
PS Thank you, Jorge 💕 You made it possible for me to write down this realisation now. You have touched my heart in so many ways. It feels right, at last.
Thank you for reading, empathising and sharing. If you like, leave me a few lines here - I appreciate every single one, even if I can't answer them all anymore. I read them all!